Happy Happy Joy Joy; I can remember crying with happiness three times in the past few years. It’s a very strange feeling crying tears of joy because sometimes they really do come out of nowhere, and at the strangest times.
I have already written about my time in Vietnam, but, when I stayed on Cat Ba Island, I went rock climbing for the first time.
The instructor, Onslo, and I still remember his name to this day. I was in awe of him; he could climb up rocks, without a rope, very nimbly. I took a shine to him instantly. Onslo explained how the equipment worked, and then I was ready to go.
I started climbing up the rock. It was fairly easy to start with, although it’s quite a struggle trying to haul your whole body up vertically. As I got higher, I started to panic a little, froze, and could not move a muscle. I was stuck halfway up the rock. I started hyperventilating and was shaking all over; I thought I was going to fall to my death. The, very patient, Onslo told me to let go of the rock and hang in mid-air. I thought he was crazy, and whimpered that I couldn’t possibly do that. I, eventually let go, and once I realised I wasn’t going anywhere, because I was harnessed, I managed to climb the rest of the way.
When I made it back down to the beach, my legs gave way under me and I literally collapsed onto the sand, and I started crying like a baby; tears of joy at having climbed the (not so very tall) mountain. It was such a sense of achievement; I’d tried something new and had been able to do it, eventually.
The second bout of joyful tears came when I passed my degree in 2013. I had started the degree, with the Open University, in 1993, and completed two courses with them, but then my life got in the way, and I didn’t continue it.
When I moved to Thailand, I restarted it. In 2011, I moved back to the UK to finish it, because it was cheaper for me to do so. I completed four courses in the space of three years. It was such hard work; at one point I was doing two courses at the same time, as well as having a full time job.
Each time I received an email to say my exam results were available, I didn’t want to look. I was afraid I hadn’t passed. But, I plucked up the courage and found I had passed every course. I cried tears of joy at the satisfaction of knowing that all the hard work I had put in had paid off.
Then when the time came for the degree ceremony, I wasn’t even going to go but my friend, Dipesh, said that I should go, and that I would be glad that I went. On the day of the ceremony, my Mum and I arrived at the venue. I was really nervous about going up on stage to collect my degree certificate.
I sat and listened to the director of the university telling us that we had made it, and that we should all feel proud after months and years of studying to achieve the degree. When my name was called, I went onstage to receive my award.
Afterwards, I was so glad that I had gone to acknowledge my achievement, I cried tears of joy once again because I felt so proud of myself.
When have you cried tears of joy?